My Father asks hard things

Christ spoke to me as a friend, a lover gentle and kind. I wasn’t letting go of my anger of loosing the baby. “Why, why would you do this?” was my constant question leading me no where and leaving me so tired and sad. Then at Ash Wednesday Mass as I smiled with a young toddler I said again “Why? This is too hard.” Jesus said to me in words and images, “My Father asks hard things.” A flash to His crucifixion, a flash to Jeff in the hospice. “I held you on your cross then, I will hold you now. I understand. I love you.”

I’m still not happy about it, but I’m not angry anymore. There is calm, a sense of peace…Matt 16:24-24

Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wishes to come after me must deny himself, take up his cross, and follow me. For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.”

“My a Father asks hard things. I will hold you. I love you”


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