On this night

We had thought we would be holding our child on our arms. God’s Will was different.
We can each think of a moment like this where God’s will was different and excruciatingly painful . And in each one of these moments we have a choice. We can surrender our will to His and come to Peace, graces in abundance and know the power of redemption or we can refuse His Will and choose to suffer. When we surrender we allow God into our hearts to make the moment survivable and ultimately sanctified, redeemed. When we follow in the footsteps of His mother, the spouse of the Holy Spirit, we walk each day closer with Him to the Son, by whom we come home to the Father.
I struggle with this idea of submission daily, and God knows it so He brought me the next step of my journey Home to him in a very quiet way. He led us back to His Mother to get to us through this very night and into the rest of our life with a the last minute request of one of my dearest friends. She called me later in the night 33 days ago and I will remember it as one of the pivotal moments of my faith journey. She told me about the consecration which I had never entertained before and something sounded so right about it immediately giving me a sense of peace. But I had to start that night to make it happen on this very momentous day of the feast of our Lady of Guadalupe for whom Olivia was given the middle name of Marianna.
We were both set upon by Spiritual warfare, but we’re totally undone as perspectives/ attitudes started falling into place, into order in our souls, as we read together each night. My husband welcomed the opportunity as well!
33 days later Brian and I have made the consecration to Mary33 Days to Morning Glory! by Fr. Michael Gaitley, MIC and along the way of preparing have already seen and known so much more, opened more. I am greatly encouraged by the number of saints and Blesseds who have done so, but it’s really that inner awakening that He didn’t take a life without giving Life back to us in abundance on this night that amazes me.
We will miss holding and knowing our Olivia every day in this life, but we know we have been so amazingly and gratefully blessed in this night, the ability to smile, this life being redeemed.

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