Delivering Olivia

I delivered Olivia Marianna at 1:40a.m. July 5th. She is so beautifully formed little baby and so delicately featured. I felt everything and wouldn’t have missed it for anything on earth. Brian cut the cord. We held her and talked to her and cried over her together. Everything went as it would with a first time live birth. We were allowed to be active parents.

The team God assembled on that day who worked with us was incredible. They were a gift from God. In fact, everyone at Northside Labor and Delivery was exactly who we needed as we needed them… And then as God would have it, us for them.

-The nurse who greeted us in the general waiting area and whisked us quickly to our room greeting us and meeting our initial anxiousness, as well as keeping us from having to witness the joyous families celebrating their new arrivals.
-The admitting nurse who had two miscarriages and helped me give voice to my immediate feelings and fears.
-The weary chaplain, who had experienced four deaths that day, but at 11pm made calls to get us a priest so I could receive the sacraments of Penance and Anointing of the Sick that made me feel whole and ready to deal with whatever would come.
-The lead doctor who’s main concern was that I not have to suffer any more than the situation was demanding of me.
-The midwife and her senior year clinical student who showed us compassion, empathy and love in their words and in their actions. They stayed with us all day and night to her delivery cheering me on in my labor and wiping my forehead with a cold compress and holding my hand. The midwife who told me quietly as she hugged me that in a strange way she was so happy she worked our case even though it was such a loss.
-To the discharge nurse who needed to hear God still loves her and wanted her to come home to the Church. She opened her heart to hear God’s love through our brief powerful conversation as she wheeled me out to the car. She gave the Holy Spirit the opportunity to work in me.

There were so many instances some very small and others large where I could see Him so clearly working through all of us, especially little Olivia. Her short little life was so amazingly full. She has only known love and security. She knows nothing of disappointment or fear or injustice or rejection. It was suggested to us that she might welcome babies who come to heaven who were unwanted and have never known love or being wanted. She has so much to share there, and here. She will always be a reminder of God’s Love, and Mercy. Grace freely given only needing an open heart to receive it.

8 Comments Add yours

  1. Brian & Judy Kilkelly says:

    Dear Linda and Brian – Our son and daughter-in-law experienced the same wonderful love and compassion at Northside when their twins were so briefly with us. The opportunity to love them and hold them was so gratifying to them and us and we constantly feel their presence in our lives. We pray for healing for you but the constant presence of Olivia Marianna in your hearts as well. Sending you all love and prayers. Brian & Judy Kilkelly

    Like

  2. Deborah says:

    I Pray for the healing of your hearts from this unimaginable pain. You always have touched my heart and my soul with your courage and strength.

    Like

    1. LindaD says:

      Thank you.

      Like

  3. Jenny says:

    I just read about your very sad news and I’m so sorry for your loss. Your words have inspired me and so many others, and now I wish I had some profound wisdom to share with you, but I don’t. Olivia was the luckiest little girl to have such a kind, caring, compassionate, and strong mother. May you and Brian feel God’s grace as you continue the healing process. My prayers are with you both.

    Like

    1. LindaD says:

      Thank you very much.

      Like

  4. Trisha says:

    Linda and Brian–This is Trisha B, your admitting nurse and I just received your beautiful card at work last night–a mere Thank You for the kind words just doesn’t seem like enough but thank you for allowing me to be part of your experience and to care for you during such an incredibly difficult time. I am blessed greatly by having you as patients and you have forever touched my heart. I fell in love with you guys that night and you have been on my mind and heart ever since. (I tried to find you on FB the very next day but was unsuccessful so I was thrilled that you left your blog site on the card!) I continue to pray for you guys and send you all the love and comfort I can. Thank you for sharing your story here. Olivia had THE most amazing parents and she’s now in heaven with my angel babies 🙂 Hugs, prayers and Love to you both!

    Like

    1. LindaD says:

      Our gift doesn’t seem enough either, you are so right, we are all in each others hearts now. We are honored by your love and very grateful for the prayers. You can find me on FB as Linda G Delgross. Peace.

      Like

  5. Trisha says:

    oh Linda, the fact that you took the time to send a card is an enormous gift that is very much appreciated. I’m Trisha Graves Braxton on FB

    Like

Leave a comment